"In ancient Egypt, cats were worshipped as gods. Cats have never forgotten this." ~ Unknown
Friday, February 20, 2009
INT. APARTMENT -- MORNING
Our beautiful grey heroine CINZA is lying on the floor in front of the balcony in a sunspot staring off into space. The warmth of the sun is making her sleepy and before long she gives in and closes her eyes. The image fades.
INT. TV STUDIO -- AFTERNOON
OPRAH is seated on stage wearing a pink T-shirt with the face of a grey kitty and the words: "Cinza's number one fan!!!"
OPRAH (to the cameras and audience) I'm very excited to introduce our guest -- the world renowned, no, make that the universally loved Cinza who comes all the way from Toronto, Canada.
OPRAH (to Cinza) Cinza, I'm very honoured to have you here on my show.
We now see CINZA lying on a Boogie Mat on top of a red velvet cushion on a beautiful antique throne. On the table next to her there's a bowl of filtered water, a second bowl filled with her favourite kitty treats, a pot of lush green cat grass, a salad dish filled with chopped romaine lettuce and a collection of colourful toys.
CINZA Thank you Oprah. I'm delighted to be here.
OPRAH We've been trying for a long time to get you to appear on my show. I want to pinch myself to make sure this isn't just a dream. Then again, if it is a dream, I never want to wake up. I want this moment to last forever.
CINZA It's so hard to find time for everything. It seems the more famous I become, the busier I get.
Cinza licks one of her dainty silver paws.
OPRAH So, Cinza, please tell us about your latest CD. Every time I hear it, it takes my breath away. You emote like no other. I can't believe how your CDs get better and better. How is that possible? How do you do it?
Cinza smiles modestly.
CINZA I'm inspired by life, by the little moments we all take for granted and of course I thank the great black Cat Goddess for all that I am and all that I accomplish.
OPRAH What was your inspiration for your new hit?
CINZA Well, you see what happened was the man had placed a bowl of Bean and Pasta Soup on the table for the woman. I immediately jumped up on the table and marched over to the soup to make sure it was safe.
After a quick inspection I decided it was safe for human consumption, but not worthy of my more refined palate because it contained no meat or lettuce.
A few days later whilst napping, the music and lyrics came to me and I got the woman to write it all down. My new CD Cinza sings about life and love with my hit song "I sniffed the soup but it wasn't worth eating" is now available for the world's purchasing pleasure.
OPRAH I noticed this album is different from all the others. Then again, each album is always different.
CINZA It's my first time singing country and western; it's almost as much fun as singing the blues. Of course I still love doing disco, opera and rap, but I need to challenge myself to keep things fresh.
My next CD will be all about drumming and will include a remix of my first big hit "Whap it, whap it good!!"
OPRAH You're so versatile, so creative. I'm awed by your talent; your CDs have always been one of my favourite things.
CINZA once again smiles modestly.
CINZA I owe it all to the great Black Cat Goddess.
OPRAH After we return from a commercial break we're in for a big treat. Cinza will sing her next big hit "So what if I like to build castles in my litter box." This song is also on her new CD and it's the world's first opportunity to hear it.
The image fades.
INT. APARTMENT -- MORNING
CINZA is lying in the same sunspot as before. She stretches and rolls over to her other side.